Paulkovich to znajomy z Tweetera, który kiedyś został zapytany przez kolegę o powody jego niewiary. Michael postanowił spisać dwadzieścia, ale się rozpędził i napisał sporą książkę. Jej atuty to nagromadzenie faktów, którego nigdzie indziej nie widziałem. Biblia jest maglowana i męczona na sto różnych sposobów, od wtórności zapisanych w niej legend, poprzez niezliczone jej absurdy, po historyczne konsekwencje działań ludzi nią inspirowanych. Trzeba autorowi przyznać, że nie pisze stylem drętwym, jest samoukiem, ale jego słownictwo jest tak bogate, że co chwilę potykałem się o jakieś nieznane mi słowa. Mały minus to konstrukcja książki, która powoduje wiele powtórzeń, kiedy autor wraca do tematu, aby go szerzej omówić. Mam wrażenie, że w niektórych momentach Michael nie zgadza się z Carrierem, innym niewierzącym, który na przykład twierdzi, że wyznawcy Mitry wcale nie wierzyli w jego męczeńską śmierć. Jak dowiadujemy się z książki, dość zagadkowa była decyzja władców Rzymu z czwartego wieku, ażeby do rangi religii państwowej podnieść akurat chrześcijaństwo. Jak wiemy, imperium średnio na tym wyszło.
[23, Michael o swojej dziewczynie, która „odnalazła” Jezusa]
As you might imagine she regressed toward homophobic and extremely conservative views; she became about as much fun as Jerry Falwell at a Joan Jett concert.
[24]
In 1270 the king of Aragon, James I, passed a law wherein all people were required to turn their Bibles in to the bishop to be burned; the penalty for not doing so was that they would be declared heretics.
[28]
Jesus himself argued he could not possibly be descended from David (Mk 12:35-37). Therefore, according to Jesus, he was not the prophesied messiah, not the savior of mankind.
[40]
The book of Genesis mentions that the Pharaoh of Egypt bestows great gifts upon Abraham including male and female slaves and camels. Christian Bishop James Ussher eventually would place this fictitious event in the exact year 1921 BCE and this approximate century is generally agreed upon by Bible scholars for the tale. This is of particular interest within this discussion because camels would not actually be introduced to that region until one thousand years thereafter.
[60]
Mithras (long before “Jesus”) was killed then resurrected on “the third day.”
Wbrew Carrierowi.
[70]
Almost exactly two thousand years ago an outspoken evangelist roams the Mediterranean somewhere around Egypt and Judea, preaching to the masses. Whether you are a believer or not, this is undisputed history and this rabble-rousing proselytizer flourished around the time we designate as 20-33 CE .
You may have guessed the name of the man of whom I speak: Carabbas.
Według Paulkovicha przerobiony na biblijnego Barabasza.
[71]
His acts and travels are well documented. I speak of a magical, saintly prophet among men, referred to as the son of god: Apollonius of Tyana.
Kolejny pierwowzór, który mógł dać początek postaci Jezusa.
[78]
Also regarding his death, it seems strange that Acts 10:38-39 (...) refers to “Jesus of Nazareth... whom they slew and hanged on a tree”
[87]
Roman prefects did not — and could not — interview every prisoner, and certainly would not have bothered with a zealot like the Jesus character, whose (Hebrew) crimes of “blasphemy” (...) were of no concern to Roman authorities.
[91]
To many early Christians, the prophesied Messiah was a spirit, an idea, a logos— a magical essence or “word” from Heaven.
[98]
Sometime between 270 and 300 philosopher Porphyry writes his Against the Christians , citing several objections to the newfangled cult of (forged) messianic prophesy.
To nawet ukazało się po polsku.
[114, Dark Ages]
Reading would be banned, “witches” murdered by millions, and Roman society rapidly would lose the body of people knowledgeable in engineering and science. Christian law even condemned bathing, being a mark of “vanity.”
[122, o chrześcijańskiej miłości bliźniego]
Fanatical monks eventually catch up with Hypatia when she is about sixty years old. They ambush her chariot on her trek homeward, strip her naked, drag her through dusty streets, and torture her to death by skinning her alive.
[173]
Printer Robert Barker attempts to produce a reprint of the KJV in 1631, and the following year he is prosecuted for unauthorized publication of a Bible. His version contains several errors: Deuteronomy 5:24, “And ye said, Behold, the LORD our God hath shewed us his glory and his greatness...” is inadvertantly printed as “...shewed us his glory and his great asse...”—and the word not was omitted from Exodus 20:14, resulting in “Thou shalt commit adultery.”
[179]
In 1704 Sir Isaac Newton uses the book of Daniel to calculate the Second Coming of Christ (and accompanying end of the world): it will not be until 2060 CE. So breathe easy, we have some time left.
Trochę szkoda, że Newton marnował swój talent na bzdury.
[190]
In 1913 Polish ophthalmologist Ludwig Lazarus Zamenhof, inventor of the artificial language Esperanto, synthesizes a religion he calls Homaranismo that is peaceful, moral and benevolent—the ultimate good deed in a world of poisonous superstition and childish cults that have persisted for millennia, attenuating human progress. Homaranismo is an Esperanto word that could be translated as “humanism” or “humanitarianism.”
[194]
In 1970 Hal Lindsey and Carole Carlson write the book The Late Great Planet Earth , eventually adapted for a movie I have not seen (nor plan to), predicting that the Rapture would come in the 1980s. The band Blondie came out with a song called “Rapture” in 1981, so Lindsey and Carlson, it seems, were right... sort of.
„Rapture” oznacza wniebowzięcie sprawiedliwych tuż przed końcem świata. W taką bzdurę wierzą miliony chrześcijan w SZA.
[217, ciekawostka]
Condoleeza Rice famously had to explain why the Bush administration ignored the President’s Daily Brief of August 6, 2001 entitled “Bin Laden to Strike in US.”
[233]
With the canon as my witness, I must raise serious objections to any “moral perfection” of Jesus. The words that come to my mind are:
- ignorant (e.g. Mt 6:25-6, Mt 6:34, Acts 10:38).
- contradictory (Lk 16:16 vs. Mt 5:17 vs. Rom 6:14 vs. Mt 19:17).
- violent (Mk 7:10, Jude 1:5-8, Lk 19:27, Mt 11:20-24).
- unjust (Lk 12:46-49).
- unforgiving and devoid of empathy (Mt 23:14).
- intolerant and racist (Mt 10:5-6, Mt 15:22-24, 2 John 1:10, Acts 13:17-19, Jude 1:5-8).
- illogical and nonsensical (Mt 5:29-30, Mt 24:37-39, Mt 12:40, Jn 3:14).
[236]
In chapter three, “Religion and War,” Ward claims Christianity had “humanising effects” on the Roman Empire. I believe the millions of victims tortured and murdered by Christian oppressors would disagree—if only they could.
[243]
Also to his credit Jesus does not infer that only dark-skinned individuals should be owned as property; Jesus is an equal-opportunity supporter of slavery and righteous lashings.
[262]
The “Moral Teachings Jesus of Nazareth,” as Thomas Jefferson put it, are in fact mostly immoral, and Jesus’ revered Sermon on the Mount counts among his most dreadful rants. His preachments included, from Matthew chapter 6:
Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them... Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat?
[268]
It seems that to be a true Christian you must hate just about everybody—except perhaps your enemies (Mt 5:44), whom you are commanded to love.
[280, o egipskiej Księdze Umarłych]
Those Egyptian texts expose the primary roots of Judaism and Christianity.
[298]
According to the account by Philostratus, Apollonius had a divine birth, practiced celibacy, and cured the ill and the blind. He cleansed entire cities of plague, could foretell the future, spoke to and fed the masses, was worshiped as a god, and was in fact the son of god.
[299]
And you know god not only hates fags (Lev 18:22), but also dykes (Rom 1:21-26).
A jednak!
[312]
Yahweh apparently forgot to tell Noah to collect seeds and plants.
[322]
Jewish historian Josephus was quite the teller of tales between 75 and 95 CE. He also wrote, perhaps, some history.
[343]
And there were no “500 witnesses” as apologists insist; this was a later insertion, and certainly not found in the Gospels—why didn’t the Gospel writers mention witnesses?
[352]
Devout Athenagoras never states that Christians believe that the son of God appeared in human form. In fact he stated the opposite.
[353]
Note that the supposedly atrocious persecution of Christians during Nero’s time was a later fabrication; but that is another story.
[354]
Fun fact : Some Bible writer seems to believe the value of pi is exactly three (2 Chron 4:2 and 1 Kings 7:23).
[362]
Saul supposedly visited Lystra and met Timothy. Before leaving, he gave Timmy’s penis a holy trim-job (Acts 16:3). If he practiced Hebrew tradition, Paul as mohel would bite Timothy’s penis to rip the foreskin off and then suck it to keep it sterile. Parting is such sweet sorrow.
[367]
“Because the Bible tells me so” is childish reasoning. “Because the brothers Grimm tell me so” makes as much sense.
[370, o Rayu Comforcie, chrześcijańskim fundamentaliście, z którego zachwytu nad bananem jako darem Boga podkpiwa sobie Paulkovich]
I would have to imagine that, as a devoted Christian, Comfort condemns both homosexuality and sodomy. I almost pity him on the day someone takes him aside and points out that there is a male appendage, readily modifiable in size and pliability, also easily held in the hand and fitting perfectly in the mouth, matching up with his banana-based tests that confirm God made such things flawless and with oral intake in mind.
However I cannot guarantee that this appendage will not squirt in Ray’s face.
[387]
Next there is the question of Noah’s ability to collect pairs of all animals on Earth, which must include all insects, dinosaurs and even unicorns (Num 23, Dt 33, Job 39, Ps 23, Isa 34, more).
[403]
“But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me.” (...) So score one point for Jesus: it was not he who made the murderous proclamation.
Słowa te wypowiada kandydat na króla, którego Jezus daje jako przykład. Czyli nadal niezbyt dobrze.
[411]
Jesus says If a woman becomes widowed, then re-marries, she is an adulterer (Mk 10:12).
[426, cytat z Roberta Ingersolla, dziewiętnastowiecznego ateisty]
If a person would follow, today, the teachings of the Old Testament, he would be a criminal. If he would strictly follow the teachings of the New, he would be insane.
[546]
One thus wonders how Horus and Jesus might go about curing hemorrhoids.
Jezus do uzdrawiania używał swojej śliny.
[546, ciekawostka]
Literally hocus-pocus : the term comes from Latin hoc est corpus meaning “this is my body” from the Jesus tales.
[551, gdzie leżał biblijny Eden?]
My guess is that Eden is located very near Jack's beanstalk.
[551, o wyznaczaniu płci za pomocą chromosomów]
Taking into account chromosomes, physical characteristics, and sexual orientation there are many “types” of people. Consider just two: (1) XY chromosomes, with penis, male breasts, bisexual; and (2) XXX chromosomes, vagina, female breasts, lesbian. You can see the number of permutations or combinations is large - in fact at least 4*3*2*4 = 96.
[23, Michael o swojej dziewczynie, która „odnalazła” Jezusa]
As you might imagine she regressed toward homophobic and extremely conservative views; she became about as much fun as Jerry Falwell at a Joan Jett concert.
[24]
In 1270 the king of Aragon, James I, passed a law wherein all people were required to turn their Bibles in to the bishop to be burned; the penalty for not doing so was that they would be declared heretics.
[28]
Jesus himself argued he could not possibly be descended from David (Mk 12:35-37). Therefore, according to Jesus, he was not the prophesied messiah, not the savior of mankind.
[40]
The book of Genesis mentions that the Pharaoh of Egypt bestows great gifts upon Abraham including male and female slaves and camels. Christian Bishop James Ussher eventually would place this fictitious event in the exact year 1921 BCE and this approximate century is generally agreed upon by Bible scholars for the tale. This is of particular interest within this discussion because camels would not actually be introduced to that region until one thousand years thereafter.
[60]
Mithras (long before “Jesus”) was killed then resurrected on “the third day.”
Wbrew Carrierowi.
[70]
Almost exactly two thousand years ago an outspoken evangelist roams the Mediterranean somewhere around Egypt and Judea, preaching to the masses. Whether you are a believer or not, this is undisputed history and this rabble-rousing proselytizer flourished around the time we designate as 20-33 CE .
You may have guessed the name of the man of whom I speak: Carabbas.
Według Paulkovicha przerobiony na biblijnego Barabasza.
[71]
His acts and travels are well documented. I speak of a magical, saintly prophet among men, referred to as the son of god: Apollonius of Tyana.
Kolejny pierwowzór, który mógł dać początek postaci Jezusa.
[78]
Also regarding his death, it seems strange that Acts 10:38-39 (...) refers to “Jesus of Nazareth... whom they slew and hanged on a tree”
[87]
Roman prefects did not — and could not — interview every prisoner, and certainly would not have bothered with a zealot like the Jesus character, whose (Hebrew) crimes of “blasphemy” (...) were of no concern to Roman authorities.
[91]
To many early Christians, the prophesied Messiah was a spirit, an idea, a logos— a magical essence or “word” from Heaven.
[98]
Sometime between 270 and 300 philosopher Porphyry writes his Against the Christians , citing several objections to the newfangled cult of (forged) messianic prophesy.
To nawet ukazało się po polsku.
[114, Dark Ages]
Reading would be banned, “witches” murdered by millions, and Roman society rapidly would lose the body of people knowledgeable in engineering and science. Christian law even condemned bathing, being a mark of “vanity.”
[122, o chrześcijańskiej miłości bliźniego]
Fanatical monks eventually catch up with Hypatia when she is about sixty years old. They ambush her chariot on her trek homeward, strip her naked, drag her through dusty streets, and torture her to death by skinning her alive.
[173]
Printer Robert Barker attempts to produce a reprint of the KJV in 1631, and the following year he is prosecuted for unauthorized publication of a Bible. His version contains several errors: Deuteronomy 5:24, “And ye said, Behold, the LORD our God hath shewed us his glory and his greatness...” is inadvertantly printed as “...shewed us his glory and his great asse...”—and the word not was omitted from Exodus 20:14, resulting in “Thou shalt commit adultery.”
[179]
In 1704 Sir Isaac Newton uses the book of Daniel to calculate the Second Coming of Christ (and accompanying end of the world): it will not be until 2060 CE. So breathe easy, we have some time left.
Trochę szkoda, że Newton marnował swój talent na bzdury.
[190]
In 1913 Polish ophthalmologist Ludwig Lazarus Zamenhof, inventor of the artificial language Esperanto, synthesizes a religion he calls Homaranismo that is peaceful, moral and benevolent—the ultimate good deed in a world of poisonous superstition and childish cults that have persisted for millennia, attenuating human progress. Homaranismo is an Esperanto word that could be translated as “humanism” or “humanitarianism.”
[194]
In 1970 Hal Lindsey and Carole Carlson write the book The Late Great Planet Earth , eventually adapted for a movie I have not seen (nor plan to), predicting that the Rapture would come in the 1980s. The band Blondie came out with a song called “Rapture” in 1981, so Lindsey and Carlson, it seems, were right... sort of.
„Rapture” oznacza wniebowzięcie sprawiedliwych tuż przed końcem świata. W taką bzdurę wierzą miliony chrześcijan w SZA.
[217, ciekawostka]
Condoleeza Rice famously had to explain why the Bush administration ignored the President’s Daily Brief of August 6, 2001 entitled “Bin Laden to Strike in US.”
[233]
With the canon as my witness, I must raise serious objections to any “moral perfection” of Jesus. The words that come to my mind are:
- ignorant (e.g. Mt 6:25-6, Mt 6:34, Acts 10:38).
- contradictory (Lk 16:16 vs. Mt 5:17 vs. Rom 6:14 vs. Mt 19:17).
- violent (Mk 7:10, Jude 1:5-8, Lk 19:27, Mt 11:20-24).
- unjust (Lk 12:46-49).
- unforgiving and devoid of empathy (Mt 23:14).
- intolerant and racist (Mt 10:5-6, Mt 15:22-24, 2 John 1:10, Acts 13:17-19, Jude 1:5-8).
- illogical and nonsensical (Mt 5:29-30, Mt 24:37-39, Mt 12:40, Jn 3:14).
[236]
In chapter three, “Religion and War,” Ward claims Christianity had “humanising effects” on the Roman Empire. I believe the millions of victims tortured and murdered by Christian oppressors would disagree—if only they could.
[243]
Also to his credit Jesus does not infer that only dark-skinned individuals should be owned as property; Jesus is an equal-opportunity supporter of slavery and righteous lashings.
[262]
The “Moral Teachings Jesus of Nazareth,” as Thomas Jefferson put it, are in fact mostly immoral, and Jesus’ revered Sermon on the Mount counts among his most dreadful rants. His preachments included, from Matthew chapter 6:
Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them... Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat?
[268]
It seems that to be a true Christian you must hate just about everybody—except perhaps your enemies (Mt 5:44), whom you are commanded to love.
[280, o egipskiej Księdze Umarłych]
Those Egyptian texts expose the primary roots of Judaism and Christianity.
[298]
According to the account by Philostratus, Apollonius had a divine birth, practiced celibacy, and cured the ill and the blind. He cleansed entire cities of plague, could foretell the future, spoke to and fed the masses, was worshiped as a god, and was in fact the son of god.
[299]
And you know god not only hates fags (Lev 18:22), but also dykes (Rom 1:21-26).
A jednak!
[312]
Yahweh apparently forgot to tell Noah to collect seeds and plants.
[322]
Jewish historian Josephus was quite the teller of tales between 75 and 95 CE. He also wrote, perhaps, some history.
[343]
And there were no “500 witnesses” as apologists insist; this was a later insertion, and certainly not found in the Gospels—why didn’t the Gospel writers mention witnesses?
[352]
Devout Athenagoras never states that Christians believe that the son of God appeared in human form. In fact he stated the opposite.
[353]
Note that the supposedly atrocious persecution of Christians during Nero’s time was a later fabrication; but that is another story.
[354]
Fun fact : Some Bible writer seems to believe the value of pi is exactly three (2 Chron 4:2 and 1 Kings 7:23).
[362]
Saul supposedly visited Lystra and met Timothy. Before leaving, he gave Timmy’s penis a holy trim-job (Acts 16:3). If he practiced Hebrew tradition, Paul as mohel would bite Timothy’s penis to rip the foreskin off and then suck it to keep it sterile. Parting is such sweet sorrow.
[367]
“Because the Bible tells me so” is childish reasoning. “Because the brothers Grimm tell me so” makes as much sense.
[370, o Rayu Comforcie, chrześcijańskim fundamentaliście, z którego zachwytu nad bananem jako darem Boga podkpiwa sobie Paulkovich]
I would have to imagine that, as a devoted Christian, Comfort condemns both homosexuality and sodomy. I almost pity him on the day someone takes him aside and points out that there is a male appendage, readily modifiable in size and pliability, also easily held in the hand and fitting perfectly in the mouth, matching up with his banana-based tests that confirm God made such things flawless and with oral intake in mind.
However I cannot guarantee that this appendage will not squirt in Ray’s face.
[387]
Next there is the question of Noah’s ability to collect pairs of all animals on Earth, which must include all insects, dinosaurs and even unicorns (Num 23, Dt 33, Job 39, Ps 23, Isa 34, more).
[403]
“But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me.” (...) So score one point for Jesus: it was not he who made the murderous proclamation.
Słowa te wypowiada kandydat na króla, którego Jezus daje jako przykład. Czyli nadal niezbyt dobrze.
[411]
Jesus says If a woman becomes widowed, then re-marries, she is an adulterer (Mk 10:12).
[426, cytat z Roberta Ingersolla, dziewiętnastowiecznego ateisty]
If a person would follow, today, the teachings of the Old Testament, he would be a criminal. If he would strictly follow the teachings of the New, he would be insane.
[546]
One thus wonders how Horus and Jesus might go about curing hemorrhoids.
Jezus do uzdrawiania używał swojej śliny.
[546, ciekawostka]
Literally hocus-pocus : the term comes from Latin hoc est corpus meaning “this is my body” from the Jesus tales.
[551, gdzie leżał biblijny Eden?]
My guess is that Eden is located very near Jack's beanstalk.
[551, o wyznaczaniu płci za pomocą chromosomów]
Taking into account chromosomes, physical characteristics, and sexual orientation there are many “types” of people. Consider just two: (1) XY chromosomes, with penis, male breasts, bisexual; and (2) XXX chromosomes, vagina, female breasts, lesbian. You can see the number of permutations or combinations is large - in fact at least 4*3*2*4 = 96.
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